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i know the inside of your thighs
like my hometown
tongue drag-racing the bends by the bay line
burning rubber at the speed of cursory seed
near the end
i did it right so you stayed mine
It's the second winter I've spent at my mother's
as an adult who went out into the world
on his own.

This time,
at least tonight,
I keep her door open as she sleeps.
Hearing her movements,
the sheets crinkle in her aliveness.

The first roof I ever had above me was her voice.
It still speaks to me.
That roof hangs over all roofs I'll ever know.
It shelters me when other houses abandon this child.
For coming late in the night to my bed from another.
With a first thought, but never another.
I am not ashamed for being sad.
I am not ashamed for feeling shame.
I am sad that I can't share my shame anymore.
I loved like I was alone.
Now I'm alone.
winter isn't quilts and netflix.
it's for cabins made of vertical bookshelves,
spines separating you from the wolves.
some of us will walk with hands to bare air,
while the rest of us fill our pockets to keep
the quarters from rousing the homeless.

i'm going to send a letter to my childhood address.
not a poem. not here, nor for you.

these film strips don't add up to a story.
much less than snow adds up to a man.
even less than light adds up to a body.
take mine, in a fit of dancing gold and godly
i'll smile if it means you think i mean it,
for a moment i thought you think about me,
this sign, reaching out in straight lines,
cutting corners, breaking rules and rulers,
don't smile because i'll think you mean it,
don't clean your name like a plate about to drop,
stop caring what words can be pulled from losses,
let silence eat silence for breakfast,
buy a bullet, call a cab, and knock on pity's door,
let 'em know who's who in town now.
i kissed a gemini                 twice
in a suit donned for dinner
with another constellation

my tongue is a tie
and a black sword
blade edge to my manhood
that gemini tugs like a leash
she wants to wear

right here in times square
where faces light up like a ghost town
of tom waits cigarettes

they follow me to my date
in the shadows of every candle
eating the smoke around her words
leaving air for our names to emerge
we unravel at the kite strings in our lungs
screaming new ones

is this what i've become?
I should have given myself to anyone
who's ever wanted to fuck me.
The sex you have isn't yours.
Heat isn't the hand it comes from,
and an orgasm isn't the muscle convulsing,
nor the neck saying, "Cum for me."
It isn't even the experience.
It isn't even the memory of the experience.
You are more than you, whether
you intend or intend not to.
You leave a trace wherever you go.
A slit sugar packet with blood and arms.
The sex you have isn't yours.
So I should have had sex with anyone
who's ever wanted to fuck me,
so that I can belong to someone other than myself
for a little while.

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GetYourGrip
vincenzo
United States
my name is Vincenzo.
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:iconmauleons:
MauLeonS Featured By Owner Aug 22, 2014  Hobbyist Photographer
Hug  HBD :D 
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:iconirrevocablefate:
IrrevocableFate Featured By Owner Aug 22, 2014   Writer
Happy birthday. :heart:
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:iconformaniac:
formaniac Featured By Owner Aug 17, 2014  Student Writer
Happy Birthday~
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:iconhappyhungrysleepy:
HappyHungrySleepy Featured By Owner Jul 3, 2014  Student General Artist
:]
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:icongetyourgrip:
GetYourGrip Featured By Owner Jul 3, 2014
hello :}
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:iconhappyhungrysleepy:
HappyHungrySleepy Featured By Owner Jul 3, 2014  Student General Artist
Helllo. ;]
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:icongetyourgrip:
GetYourGrip Featured By Owner Jul 3, 2014
what brought you to my little this here page?
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(1 Reply)
:iconyouinventedme:
YouInventedMe Featured By Owner Jan 23, 2014   Writer
Thanks for the :+fav: on apoc in prog,  V in Cenzo
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:iconoaklungs:
oaklungs Featured By Owner Dec 12, 2013
thank you for watching me too :rose:
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:icongetyourgrip:
GetYourGrip Featured By Owner Dec 19, 2013
certainly~
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